Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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