She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Will exercising make me less horny?
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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