Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
