You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
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