You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
