I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize