i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
