So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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