Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
