Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize