do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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