i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Randomize
