the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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