I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
