C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
