guys are not supposed to queef...right?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
