Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
