come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
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