Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
