yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
