well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize