You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize
