The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
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