Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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