this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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