If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
