I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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