We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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