the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
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