Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
this hospital has no fireball
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
