I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I could make wine with my vomit
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
