Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
