Just cropdusted the office
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
