I am puke
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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