i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
