I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
