Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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