I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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