i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
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