We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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