On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
