dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
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