do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
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