..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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