If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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