He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
