Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
