never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize