I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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