After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
