I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
