just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
