I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
